This week in football ....

Almost one week later and still the recrimination and regret rage on. England will be staying home while the 16 other European nations battle it out at the European Championships in Austria and Switzerland next summer.

Abysmally and toothlessly, England lost the must-draw match against Croatia. The same match that I had expected to lack zing because England needed only a draw and Croatia had already qualified. I had not reckoned on the idiocy of the English fans that booed the Croatia national anthem and verily lit a fire under the Croatian players. SCS received his marching orders barely twelve hours after the match. Both Ferguson and Wenger had labeled the decision as "hasty" but it would seem the FA had little choice if it was to maintain any creditability at all with the public. The search for a replacement has taken on a circus-like quality, with every out-of-work (or soon to be out-of-work) manager having his name thrown into the ring. Several of the gainfully employed are also in the mix, willingly or otherwise. Most amusing of all has been the parade of managers that have graciously withdrawn their names from consideration. I don't think anybody wants this job!

And frankly, despite the 2.5 million pounds salary, who would really want to be England manager? Whenever something goes wrong, the manager is almost the first to have the finger pointed in his direction. I usually have no time for McLaren or his bland platitudes, but I felt some real sympathy for him during his farewell press conference. He had always tried hard, too hard, to appear impervious to the pressures of the job. At the end, when he allowed the cracks to show, it was clear that the pressure had been too much for him, and had been too much for longer than he cared to admit.

In the wake of the non-qualification mishap, there has been the miles of analysis on what went wrong, who to blame and how to fix it. Was it all McLaren's fault? Would things have been different with a different coach? Would firing him and getting the right man in fix this malaise in the England national team? Or do the problems go deeper than that? Is there a systemic failure that starts from the very grass-roots of soccer development? In which case, maybe SCS was just the unlucky SOB that got caught at the wrong place at the wrong time.

I reckon it's probably contextual. If Croatia had not scored that last goal (for instance, had Petric struck the ball just a fraction earlier or later), the attention would be focused on Beckham's heroics. It would not have masked England's poor performance (even a victory would not be enough to divert attention from how badly the team played), but perhaps the autopsy might have been staved off for another few months. They were playing atrociously and were so obviously outclassed by the Croatians in terms of ability and tactics, but somehow managed to score two goals and to only lose by one. It is not inconceivable that they could have pulled off the draw and qualified, even though they did not deserve to. And how different might the reactions be had they managed it?

So, was it all McLaren's fault that England stays home next year? I think the FA was right to fire him, if only because he should never have been given the job in the first place. But it wasn't all his fault. If anything, the English FA is probably more culpable than McLaren, for putting someone so blatantly unsuited into the position, and expecting him to be what he cannot be. I personally think that England was unfortunate to be missing Rooney, Owen et al., and especially Terry and Ferdinand in defence. England's players are not so poor that the first choice team would not be regarded as among the top 16 in Europe.

Whether English players are good enough for an England team to win a major tournament? That's another kettle of fish altogether. McLaren's England was never going to win anything, not even with Rooney et al. fit and playing. Sven's England also never won anything. Might Mourinho's England be good enough? Or O'Neill's England? Or Capello's England?

Frankly, it was only Ramsey's England that ever won a major tournament. That was 41 years ago when England had the advantage of being World Cup hosts. Since then, zilch. I don't even think this lack of silverware has much to do with the quality of the players or the coaching. English teams go into all tournaments with expectations far out of proportion to their actual accomplishments. Teams like Italy, Germany and Brazil equally sky-high expectations, but importantly, they also have the track record to justify the expectations. It makes all the difference; at some point, English players probably become stifled by self-expectations, but the teams with traditions of success can feed off expectations to instill self-belief and a sense of destiny.

Perhaps it is time for England to stop regarding itself as a major footballing nation on the international stage. The English Premier League is certainly a major footballing league and top English clubs are certainly major clubs, but the national team? Not so much. England should stop going into tournaments with any expectation of victory, and just be happy to have qualified at all. Freed from the straitjacket of unrealistic expectations, perhaps they might start playing to their potential and achieve something - not a tournament championship, perhaps, but at least respect and the admiration of the footballing world. And who knows, if they get their act together, England as minnows might even win something. After all, Denmark and Greece came from nowhere to become European Champions.

Managerial Musical Chairs

Steve Bruce is now the confirmed new manager of Wigan.

It's not yet Christmas and a quarter of the EPL clubs have changed managers.

Wigan
Birmingham (by default, I wonder who's going there?)
Chelsea
Tottenham
Bolton

Surely this must be some sort of a record?

Lucky England??

I had it all worked out in my head. There was a way for England to qualify for Euro 2008 and get a new manager. It was an unlikely and convoluted scenario, which involved Russia drawing with Israel and Croatia losing to Macedonia over the weekend. This would have left the mid-week qualifiers as such: Croatia still needing a point against England, Russia needing Croatia to achieve said point while securing a win in their own match against Andorra. In my unlikely scenario, Russia crashes to a spectacular defeat against Andorra by some massive goal difference and England loses in the customary uninspired manner to a Croatia team that has something to play for. The upshot is that England qualifies, but only through the furthest back of backdoors and despite an abysmal performance. The vultures begin circling and McLaren's head goes on the chopping block for the umpteenth time.

Well, never mind all that. Israel beat Russia in exactly the sort of improbable circumstances that prompt comments about balls being round and there being no sure-things in soccer. The football was more chuck-bin than champagne, but it was dramatic stuff, complete with a last gasp winner for Israel after Russia had just hit the post moments earlier. For much of the 2nd half, I was resigned to a Russian victory given the lack of action in Russia's half of the field. Then, mayhem in the closing minutes and England was alive again.

My scenario could still happen (Andorra beating Russia and England losing to Croatia), but some sting has been taken out of the Wembley encounter. Croatia does not need to play for a result and England needs a draw and not a win.

McLaren might still find his job endangered. Certain factions of the England support base are actually disappointed that Israel has handed their team a lifeline, perceiving this as an unwarranted extension of McLaren's stint. Such is the degree of utter disillusionment with Second Choice Steve. I have said it before; it's part of why I find it enjoyable to support English sporting teams - they have the most fascinating fans!

Should SCS be kept? Frankly, until Wednesday's match, all arguments for or against are just so much tosh for column inches. If England falls to an abject defeat (possible), the hatchets will be out. If they stumble to an unconvincing draw or eke out a narrow win (probable), debate will rage. If they manage another 3 goal win at Wembley, all the while playing like Manchester United in recent weeks? Maybe the New Dawn would be heralded again.

It was just two matches ago when England was on a roll of 3-0 victories and the team was being praised. You're only as good as your last game. Sure, McLaren's hand was forced by injuries and suspensions; he probably got the team balance right despite himself. But he did manage to marshal limited resources and to work around the loss of key players. This is part of football management and he does deserve some credit for this.

Not that I am a McLaren defender by any means. I do realise that much of my dislike is completely subjective. I find him off-putting in his interviews, with his vapid smiles and usually meaningless utterances. He's not very interesting when he talks and he compounds it by being a charisma vacuum. He inspires neither affection nor respect. I am sure he's a regular likable fellow to those who know him, but he's also a regular PR nightmare. Part of the job of a national manager is to project intelligence and conviction; a sense of knowing what needs to be done and how to do it. He does not come across as being particularly astute and most gallingly, he does not even seem passionate about his job.

Are these reasons enough to give him the axe? Well, they should have been reason enough for him not to be hired in the first place. And since they did hire him despite these, I suppose they owe it to him to assess his performance based on the team's results. If England ends up topping the qualifying group, the objective yardstick would suggest that McLaren has succeeded. Yes, lucky, yadda yadda yadda, but seriously, have England been all that lucky? They've had to play several matches without various first team players, with Rooney, Terry, Owen, Lampard, Ashley Cole etc being unavailable at different junctures. As the luck factor usually does, it probably evens out in the final analysis.

So, until Wednesday, I am willing to give Second Choice a moratorium on the "stay or slay" discussions. He still has to get the result against Croatia and that is certainly far from being a formality.

I personally would like to see England in Euro 2008, even if I am not convinced that their football consistently warrants the spot. It's just always much more fun to follow the English media's coverage of any sporting event when they have a home team to support, despair over or sarcastically write off.

Calling 'em out: The Aftermath

IT WORKED !!!

Sadly, I missed most of this 8-0 drubbing of Besiktas, having nodded off at some point between the first and second goals.

Amazingly, Liverpool now holds the record for the most goals scored in a Champs League match.Two weeks ago, the team was playing poorly and losing points, and their collective confidence, at Besiktas. Arsenal equalled the previous record of 7 goals and dazzled everyone in the process. Now, Liverpool has beaten that record. This is just whack, as the kids say.

I should have launched the offensive right at the start of the season. Liverpool might actually be above both Blackburn and Portsmouth, had I done it. Obviously, these guys need a dose of the call-out voodoo to get their acts together. They all rose to the occasion.

Rafa finally picked Crouch!! And he actually had an attack-focused game plan!! It's almost too much to take in.

Gerrard scored a good goal.

Soccernet said that Voronin played his best match for Liverpool and Kevin McCarra at the Guardian praised his "irrepressible movement". Okay, I am willing to cut him some slack for not scoring. But he's not off the hook completely. This was a night that the team managed 8 goals and he started the match as a striker, yet he managed no goals?? (I figure I need to keep this up, if he's ever going to score for Liverpool again.)

Ryan Babel scored 2 goals, doubling his tally in one fell swoop. Prior to this match? 2 goals from 12 appearances for Liverpool.

Hattrick hero was Benayoun, determined to prove himself anything but "aimless". Now for the really important fall-out from this performance: Can Benayoun do it for England Israel against Russia?

Calling 'em ALL out

Okay, I am giving this another shot. Keeping faith is not working, so the "call out" strategy has to go into full-gear.

This has rarely failed me before. In the past, I have called Rio Ferdinand a has-been, Didier Drogba a no-hoper, Frank Lampard over-rated, Emile Heskey a non-striker, Christiano Ronaldo burnt-out, etc. In all those cases, they proved me resoundingly wrong. It's practically a guarantee that once I write someone off, they spectacularly make me eat humble pie.

No more pussy-footing around. I am calling out the whole lot of 'em at Anfield, beginning with Senor Benitez himself.

Rafa Benitez - He's NOT a Liverpool manager (with apologies to Steve "Macca" McMahon). He's just NOT. The most adventurous thing he has done this season is his redesigned facial hair, which looks about as convincing as his team does on the pitch. Attacking football is against his natural instinct and the team seems completely stymied by his devotion to his system. I don't particularly mind his much pilloried rotation policy, but why does he never play Crouch and keep persisting with the non-performing Kuyt and Voronin (yeah, I am getting stuck in early)? He has not spent wisely, cannot seem to inject any imagination into the team and has now achieved a win-ratio which is poorer than Blackburn's, of all indignities. And Liverpool is behind Portsmouth on points.

Voronin - At the moment, in the running to be the dud buy of the season. From the looks of him, it's probably the only running he's been doing lately. To be fair, he is likely a better player than recent performances suggest, but I don't care. If he does not score soon, he can go and be that better player at a different club.

Kuyt - Sigh. Possibly THE dud buy of last season, considering the amount that Benitez spent on him. He seems particularly lead-footed this year and even less threatening than Emile Heskey during the low-point of his Liverpool years. No pace, not much imagination, can't head, no killer instinct for the finish. Why is he a striker again?

Babel - Not liking what I have seen so far. Touted for versatility, but no penetration as a forward and a poor crosser as a winger. Possibly another expensive Rafa mistake? Looking like a 'yes' to that.

Gerrard - I know he's a Liverpool legend, but he hasn't been all that hot in recent matches. Missed passes galore and seems a less intelligent player than last season. Other than his tradedmark stampeding runs and the odd lucky goal, what else is he contributing lately?

Agger, Carragher - Okay, the defenders are probably less culpable than others but need to do a whole lot more to propel the team forward once they clear the defensive line. Got get involved in the attacking action, yo!

Hyppia - Own goals. Enough said.

Benayoun, Pennant, Mascherano, Sissoko - Lack urgency and seem to be rather aimless in midfield. And all that back-passing when they should be building forward momentum. Maybe Rafa's fault, but use some damned imagination, willya? I sometimes get the feeling that this bunch is having a tiff with the strikers, because they refuse to get the ball to the forward line.

Arbeloa, Finnan, Riise - More width, people, more width! And better crossing, please! You're not supposed to be aiming for players on the opposing team. Or for the stands, or for open patches of turf. Memorise your team colours!

Torres - Leaving him alone for now since he's injured. But the jury is still very much out on him. So far, too profligate for comfort, especially in this team that doesn't create enough to afford profligacy.

Champions' League tonight. Home match vs Besiktas. Must win and all that. We've been there before.